When should you first say “I love you”?
A lot of people might give you an answer like “when it feels right”
But chances are, if you’re asking this, you’ve never said it before. So that might leave you stumped “we’ll when is the
Then you might wonder how you’ll even know when it’s love. Someone might tell you “when you’re really on love, you just know.” This leaves you at a stump when you’re first curious about love: you don’t know how to objectively identify it, or even when you should annoy be that you feel it. That’s the thing about love, though. It’s not something that can be properly examined or explained. It can be a destroyer of some’s better intuition. Or leave us baffled when this intangible and indescribable feeling, makes us feel like we are stuck, when we are deprived of this other being that we somehow care for so much.
There are people who will say what love should be, or what it is to them. They try to put a definition on it and what it means. But love can differ so much from person to person. We all love differently, and feel differently, than others. If love was this basic thing that we could describe, we’d have to slot it into categories, or even rename the different kinds of love. You can love many things: your parents, pets, or significant other. But those loves are not all the same kind of love.
Some factors that I think the loves we have for certain people are built upon;
•they raised you (most of the time)
•they taught you how to do things
•they provide for you
•the ties to them are permanent– no matter what, they are your biological parents
•they have seen you cry (even if they’ve only seen you cry about physical pains and not very emotional ones)
•you came from them (basically applied to moms mainly on this one)
Pet love (love you have for your pets, things you are fond of them for, and do for then out of love):
•you pet and cuddle them
•they offer a non-judging little shoulder to cry on
•they’re warm and cute (and since you chose them, the are your style of animal that you like)
•(most of the time) they’re loyal back to you when you treat them well
•you feed them because you want them to live
significant other love:
•You chose this person because you liked them
•you find them sexually pleasing and attractive
•you’re intimate with them
•they’re associated with psychical and mental pleasure
•you shared thoughts and feelings with them on a broad spectrum of subjects
•you oust your trust in them
•you have bonded together through mutual experiences
•they’ve (or might have) seen you at your rawest emotional level, or basically vulnerable
•they give you intimate attention by choice, they don’t have to, and weren’t made to love you and pay attention to you, but they do
•they excite you
•lastly, they can sometimes consume most of your conscious thoughts (you spend a lot of time thinking about them)
These are all (random possible) factors that could show how your love of different things is formed upon different components. They are not my definitions of what love is exactly, but they are different experiences you might feel in each of these relationships. So, say you love your parents and partner. You are sexually attracted to your partner though, which adds a different element to your love for them, and adds a part that the parent love doesn’t possess. That’s one of the many possible things that make those relationships different.
All of these loves are deep, but different in certain ways. Some components might be the same. But all of the factors make the types of love different.
What’s true love? “How do I know your love is true?”
What does this even mean really? What is ‘true’ love? Some will say “it’s when you’re in a crowded room and you see him, and when he looks at you, you still feel butterflies.” “Love, true love, doesn’t have boundaries as to how far it will go.” “It’s when you can talk for hours and not get bored.” There might be many comments people offer up, just to show how truly ‘in love’ they must be. Is it true love when they don’t ever make you mad? I don’t think so, for some people it could be. Or maybe, true love is when, despite how they act, you can’t give up on being with them, or loving them– You’re enamored with them. You can’t explain why you still love them–despite the fact that you might go through some tough times.
They are an individual who fits into you as if you’ve lived life, thinking you were a whole set, only to find out that they were a missing piece from you all along. Thoughts of loosing your piece scares you. You’re afraid that you won’t be able to find another one that morphs into you quite as seamlessly. What you fear is that you’ll end up not being their missing piece. Dating– relationships, are a puzzle. Sometimes you meet a piece that doesn’t fit right, then some might find a piece that slides in just fine, but isn’t fitting as well as it could. Sometimes, you find a piece that has the right pattern and shape, but you rotate it in all several of the wrong directions until you almost give up on it– but then, it fits.
So those were just some random thoughts (hopefully fairly consistent ones?) that I just jotted down on a piece of paper. I decided that I wanted to type it up and share it with all of you though. I’m not trying to claim that I know anything about love, but those were just some thoughts I had about it.
So what do you think? Have you ever been in love? What is love to you?