truthful opinions

Today I was watching a lot of YouTube videos and came across this one channel that i have seen a few times before “dude panel.” Now i don’t know what I think of the channel yet, but i don’t think i’ll be inclined to subscribe to them in the near future… for a few reasons. The host always says something to the effect of “hey beautiful” to the audience of whoever views the videos, so I don’t really think that is genuine and really necessary. The channel is comprised of multiple “dudes” who share their opinions whether it be in a group setting of them all chatting, or of each one of them alone doing videos on different subjects. There was this one discussion video that they did where about 5 or 6 of them where in a room and they were giving opinions of “does a girl’s weight matter?” This video was made years ago in 2008, but I don’t think that makes any of their words less authentic to this day. First of all, I don’t believe that going into this video they thought of anything other than sharing their own thoughts about the question. Do you really expect a constructive answer from guys in a group consulting each other on their opinions? Their videos are made based on opinion and they can offend people. But if you think about it, most things have the ability to offend people in some way or another… I think one thing that made women mad about it was the fact that there were some chubby, big bellied guys giving their opinions about how a girl can’t put on “too much weight” or she won’t be attractive anymore. These were uncensored opinions from average looking guys just talking to each other, but I think viewers failed to keep something in mind while watching the video. These guys are talking about the girl that would ideally be what most guys would want (which i don’t think a sample of guys really can pin-point an exact look that you should attain in order to be attractive to everyone in the world, but…) and they weren’t going to make a 7-10 minute video on guys that all going around saying “every girl is beautiful” (even though they have said actually said, “you are all beautiful,” in a video before…). If girls were to make a video on what they find attractive, a lot of guys would probably have a hard time feeling at ease with it as well, too.

Girls would probably say 6 pack abs with a nice ass and nice legs, but there are caveats to everything, and that wouldn’t include the specific details of what shape of those things is attractive. Some girls find chunky guys with abs hot, while others find skinny guys with abs attractive too. What to keep in mind is that no one should be giving an opinion about weight because it is all subjective when it comes down to attractiveness. You (being a guy or a girl) could have a very exceptional body, but might still not possess someone’s preferred skin color, hair color, eye color, face shape, muscular structure, and so on. Girls like to be conscious about their appearance and that is why I believe that these men gave their opinions on this subject in the first place, because there is the demand for opinions and feedback, but it should be taken with a grain of salt as well. Knowing what guys like may be beneficial if you have all of those features already, yet it can be defeating for those who just don’t have the genetics for the desired look. Guys may say they are an “ass man,” or a “boob man,” but you might not be well endowed in those areas, but that isn’t to say all hope is lost. There will always be someone who is attracted to your type, and there will always be someone who isn’t attracted to it as well! Just like we are not all attracted to every type of guy, no guy is attracted to every type of girl. So for anybody who watches “dude panel” or would like to go and comment on their video “does a woman’s weight matter,” keep these thoughts in mind. Why does the opinion of someone who is not my type even matter to me? Who is my type? Am I attracted to every guy I see? No, so guys probably aren’t attracted to every girl. Basically the video should have kindly said “girls, we care about you staying healthy and don’t want to have you gaining weight and becoming unhealthy” because it’s true, you might change if you put on weight, maybe become a little less confident, happy, motivated to be attractive, etc. But there’s no reason that you should take much offense about their opinion, for that is all it is… An opinion, not a fact. Some of them complained about if a girl gained like 10-30 pounds, she wouldn’t be hot anymore, but does the same go for guys? If you had a guy that was nice and toned when you got him, would you be upset if he put on weight and that came along with an unappealing beer gut and man boobs? Instead of becoming offended by these types of videos, maybe we could turn on our own camera and invite some friends over and make one by us. Guys might be well overdue for hearing a video of honest opinions by girls.

love and crazy things

It’s so strange, the one type of “love” that most of us never question is the love that is portrayed and enjoyed by tv characters. The other day I was watching a really good show (I won’t mention the name just in case any of you watch the show, I don’t want to spoil it). So the main girl gets cheated on by a boyfriend and they break up but remain still in contact because they talk in the hallways at school. A lot of episodes later, she is with a new guy and he is like the all around sweet guy that wouldn’t cheat on her and begins as her friend. They eventually date and then the ex becomes a problem because she is worried about him, so she tracks him down one day, and somehow (I won’t say how unless it is requested) he gets beaten up. She’s there for him, one thing leads to another, they kiss and have sex and she cheats on the “friend” boyfriend, but at the time they were going through a small, maybe big, fight. So she is in love with the ex that cheated on her and the cheating is somewhat behind them, but now she is doing the same thing to a whole other guy because of the fact that she had sex with her ex that she is still in love with. I’m very conflicted, you see, because she is a really sweet character, and she doesn’t want to hurt the guy, but it’s done already. So questions for you all: Would you ever get back with an ex who cheated on you? If you cheated on them with someone else, would that in any way make you understand how they could just cheat on you? Thoughts? Do you think that love can blind your thoughts and make you do things that you would normally not do? Have you ever cheated on anyone? I’d really enjoy to hear any feedback that you all have.

Describe yourself

Should i describe who I am, or what I am like? Colleges ask you to write following these prompts saying, “in order to get to know you Brett, we ask that you answer this:……. Blah blah blah”, pretending like they care about you, when in realty it’s a mandatory probing of the self-conscious so that they know you are a “critical thinker”. That phrase in itself baffles me, it makes me feel like such an expectation has been placed on me when I’m advised to ‘think critically at a college level,’ so I’m stressed because there’s no measure of capability for critical thinking. It involves your subjective take on something, which is then processed by another human mind in a subjective rather than objective way. So, either your work is enjoyable, or it’s not. You don’t have any benchmark, because that’s not how it works. I guess a little bit of stress is healthy for everyone, but why not be really specific about what you mean? Do you want the anecdotal version of my life that recounts my entire history back to front including medical records? or do you want the fun version that shows human-like characteristics? I don’t see how the later could impress an intellectual that is looking for ‘bright’ individuals, but then again I suppose it’s the level of your vocabulary that matters to them. Overall, i think that the statements used in schooling are basically an educator’s mental master key that they use to scare students into relinquishing any mental observations that they may have, because they are scared that they may not measure up.

And I want you to fall… Because you are everything that meant something to my heart and you let that all just fall apart

-Airy

I’ve fallen for you countless times, but what matters is that last time, because the last time I fell for you, you didn’t bother to catch me.

-Airy

Books

So I did it– I read my favorite book again. it’s strange how one book that will always contain the same story, and always ends the same way, can still remain exciting to read. It has been so long since I had last read it that some parts felt like they were new. It was as if magical book fairies highlighted words for me to distinctly notice this time around. Maybe it’s not the fairies, though. Possibly it could be this entire last year or more that has gone by since I had last read the book. Overtime, it’s not that you find certain parts of the story less important, and swap them out for new details, but the ones that seemed so important at first kind of fade to the background because new parts of life are more relevant to you now, so new parts of the story start having added significance. The only concept I had had of what “love” could be when I first read the book was just simply comprised of what I had read previously in my life. Now, I have had boyfriends, and have felt “in love,” or at least been close to feeling “love.” Lately though, I’m just skeptical about a lot. I feel as though there needs to be a list that I start making now of what I want, because previously just looking at people and accessing them then and there and thinking “hmm…they are attractive, I have a crush on them” hasn’t worked so well. I know that I’m young and have a lot of time to think about that, but I want to focus at least on the qualities that I won’t tolerate, and on the ones that I want in somebody that I’m dating. Anyway, my current status: single. (For future reference for myself I’m going to start doing that. I might mention options, and I will certainly mention if I’m in a relationship or not– if I can remember to do so, that is…)

If you want the name of the book, just ask in the comments below 🙂